Text Leveling System

Shrek

RDQ:	1129	Max Word/Sent	56	Total Words	1157		Diff Words	529
Lex	770	Ave Word/.Sent	9	Hi Freq occurs	688	59.5%	Hi freq	177	33.5%
AR	3.8	Long Sentences	4.8	Low Freq occurs	139	12%	Low freq	120	22.7%

His mother was ugly and his father was ugly but Shrek was uglier than
the two of them put together. By the time he toddled Shrek could spit
flame a full ninety-nine yards and vent smoke from either ear. With just
a look he cowed the reptiles in the swamp. Any snake dumb enough to 
bite him instantly got convulsions and died.]]
One day Shrek's parents hissed things over and decided it was about
time their little darling was out in the world doing his share of damage.
So they kicked him goodbye and Shrek left the black hole in which
he'd been hatched.]]
Shrek went slogging along the road giving off his awful fumes. It
delighted him to see the flowers bend aside and trees lean away to let
him go by.]]
In a shady copse he came across a witch. She was busy boiling bats in 
turpentine and turtle juice and as she stirred she crooned:

"This is the way I cook my bats
Stir my bats taste my bats
Season my bats in the morning;
Stew and brew and chew my bats
Diddle and fiddle and faddle my bats
Early in the morning."

"What a lovely stench!" Shrek cackled. The witch specialized in horrors 
but one single look at Shrek made her woozy.]] 
When she recovered her senses Shrek said "Tell my fortune madam 
and I'll let you have a few of my rare lice."
"Splendid!" crowed the witch. "Here's your fortune.

"Otchky-potchky itchky-pitch
Pay attention to this witch.
A donkey takes you to a knight- 
Him you conquer in a fight.
Then you wed a princess who
Is even uglier than you.
Ha ha ha and cockadoodle
The magic words are 'Apple Strudel."

"A princess!" Shrek cried. "I'm on my way!"]] 
Soon he came upon a peasant singing and scything. "You there varlet" 
said Shrek. "Why so blithe?"
The peasant mumbled this reply:

"I'm happy scything in the rye
I never stop to wonder why.
I'll hone and scythe until I die.
But now I'm busy. So goodbye."]] 
"Yokel" Shrek snapped. "What have you in that pouch of yours?"
"Just some cold pheasant."
"Pheasant peasant? What a pleasant present!"
The last thing the peasant saw before he fainted was Shrek's glare 
warming up his dinner. Shrek ate and moved on.]]
Wherever Shrek went every living creature fled. How it tickled
him to be so repulsive!]]
Fat raindrops began sizzling on Shrek's hot knob.
"Did you ever see somebody so disgusting?" said Lightning to Thunder.
"Never" Thunder growled. "Let's give him the works."
Lightning fired his fiercest bolt at Shrek's head. Shrek just
gobbled it belched some smoke and grinned. Lightning Thunder and
Rain departed.]]
In high spirits Shrek stalked on. At the edge of a woods he found this
warning nailed to a tree:
Harken stranger.
Shun the danger!
If you plan to stay the same
You'd best go back from wence you came.
Shrek of course swaggered right past.]]
And sure enough a little way into the woods a whopper of a dragon
barred his path. Shrek smiled and bowed. The dragon slammed him to the
ground but Shrek just lay there. He was amused.]]
The irascible dragon was preparing to separate Shrek from his noggin.
But Shrek got him between the eyes with a putrid blue flam.
The poor dragon thudded over unconscious for the day.]]
An hour later Shrek himself was unconscious. He had fallen asleep along
the way. He dreamed he was in a field of flowers where children frolicked
and birds warbled. Some of the children kept hugging and kissing him and
there was nothing he could do to make them stop.]]
He woke up in a daze babbling like a baby: "It was only a bad dream...
a horrible dream!"]]
Shrek wandered on. He was wondering if he'd ever meet his princess
when he saw a donkey grazing. Was this the donkey the witch had fortold?
Shrek hurried over and tried the magic words: "Apple Strudel!"
The donkey raised his sleepy eyes and brayed:
"I graze in the green
As I graze in the green
Seeking out the clover.
I laze and spend my days in the green
A chewing chomping rover."]]
"You jabbering jackass!" Shrek screamed. "Aren't you supposed to take
me somewhere?"
"I am. To the nutty knight. Who guards the entrance. To the crazy castle.
Where the repulsive princess. Waits."
"Then take!" Shrek shreiked and he hopped onto the donkey's back.]]
They soon came to a drawbridge where a suit of armor stood. Shrek
knocked on the breastplate and demanded: "Who dwells inside this armor
and also in yonder castle?"
"In here a fearless knight in there a well-born fright" was the answer.
"It's my princess!" said Shrek. "The one I'm to wed!"
"Over my dead body!" roared the fearless knight.
"Over your dead body" Shrek agreed.]]
"Not so brave thou churlish knave!" countered the knight.
"Do me the honor to step aside so Shrek can go meet his bride"
Shrek commanded.
"Magician's mercury plumber's lead I smite your stupid scabby head."
And the knight smote.]]
Shrek popped his eyes opened his trap and bellowed a blast of fire.
The knight red-hot dove into the stagnant mote.
With a nasty snort of triumph Shrek crossed the bridge and marched
into the castle. And there for the first time ever he found out what fear was.]]
All around him were hundreds of hideous creatures. He was so appalled
he could barely manage to spit a bit of flame. All those horrid others
spat back. He started to run; they all ran. He lashed out at the nearest one
but what he struck was glass.]]
Shrek was in the Hall of Mirrors! "They're all me!" he yodeled. "All
ME!" He faced himself full of rabid self-esteem happier than ever to be
exactly what he was.]]
He strode on in and his fat lips fell open. There before him was the most
stunningly ugly princess on the surface of the planet.
"Apple Strudel" Shrek sighed.
"Cockadoodoodle" cooed the princess.]]
Said Shrek: "Your horny warts your rosy wens
Like slimy bogs and fusty fens 
Thrill me."
Said the princess: "Your lumpy nose your pointy head
Your wicked eyes so livid red
Just kill me."]]
Said Shrek: "Oh ghastly you
with lips of blue
Your Ruddy eyes
With carmine sties
Enchant me.
"I could go on
I know you know
The reason why
I love you so -
You're ugh-ly!"
Said the princess: "Your nose is so hairy
Oh let us not tarry
Your look is so scary
I think we should marry."]]
Shrek snapped at her nose. She nipped at his ear. They clawed their way
into each other's arms. Like fire and smoke these two belonged together.]]
So they got hitched as soon as possible. And they lived horribly ever
after scaring the socks off all who fell afoul of them.]]

Subjective Criteria

Illustrations: Some support

Dialog: Two speakers

Vocabulary: Many difficult words

Language: Colorful, figurative

Sentences: Multiple phrases

Text structure: Story/Poem

Inferences: Some implications

Complexity: Several ideas - closely related

Concept: Fanciful

Features

Character traits

Topic

Witches

Monsters

Magic

Rhyme

Castles

Princes/Princesses

Knights

*Fictional Ideas/Charac

Low Frequency Words

afoul	amused	appalled	babbling	belched
blithe	brayed	breastplate	brew	carmine
churlish	cockadoodle	cockadoodoodle	conquer	convulsions
copse	countered	cowed	crowed	departed
drawbridge	dwells	enchant	esteem	fens
fiercest	flam	fortold	fortune	frolicked
fusty	ghastly	glare	gobbled	happier
harken	hatched	hideous	hone	honor
horribly	horrid	instantly	irascible	itchky
jabbering	jackass	knave	knight	knob
lashed	laze	livid	madam	magician's
manage	mercury	mirrors	mote	nailed
nipped	noggin	otchky	pheasant	pleasant
plumber's	potchky	pouch	putrid	rabid
raindrops	repulsive	rosy	rover	ruddy
scabby	scaring	scythe	scything	season
separate	shreiked	shrek	shrek's	shun
sizzling	slogging	smite	smote	spat
specialized	splendid	stagnant	stalked	stench
sties	stirred	strode	strudel	stunningly
swaggered	swamp	tarry	thou	thudded
toddled	turpentine	uglier	unconscious	varlet
wandered	warbled	warts	wence	wens
whopper	woozy	yodeled	yokel	yonder